book review of if he had been with me

Heidi Dischler

Book review: if he had been with me by laura nowlin.

With friendships lost and found, and a doomed romance, I knew I had to review If He Had Been with Me for you guys. Not only because it’s super popular and has been recommended on every social media platform I’m on, but because it’s genuinely a good book. There’s a reason it ended up on my Top Ten Best Reads of 2022 blog post.

Book Information

Autumn knows she’s not like everyone else. Sure, she’s “pretty” by other people’s standards, but she’s also weird, too. Her only best friend for most of her life was Finny, her mother’s best friend’s son. They’re basically like family and Finny and Autumn have been inseparable since birth. Until, they weren’t.

Now, as Autumn and Finny navigate high school, they find out where they fit within society’s standards even if that means they’re not allowed to hang out together. But as they get older, it seems like neither can forget the bond that they share, and it might be something more than just friendship.

Review | Heidi Dischler

Alright. I’m going to start with the writing, the characters, and the plot before getting into specifics about what I liked about the story and disliked.

With the writing specifically, I thought it was beautifully written and very in tune to its main character. However, some of the writing to me felt so monotone and just… flat. I don’t know if that’s because Laura Nowlin was trying to make it sound more like the main character, Autumn, but to me, it just felt forced with writing. For one thing, inner thoughts, writings, and anything that wasn’t dialogue had no contractions. Instead of saying “can’t,” it would be cannot. Instead of “it’s,” it became it is. It honestly drove me a little mad and I cannot even begin to explain the reason why. It just peeved me.

Character-wise? This book landed right on the mark. The characters felt unique, well thought out, and completely individualistic when it came to quirks, emotions, and driving forces. Autumn was well-written even if she was a bit annoying at times. Finn, of course, was my favorite. Because, of course, the nice, shy, cutesy guy is my favorite. I love a dude who blushes.

Now, plot? There are a couple of things I would’ve personally done differently. I didn’t like the fact that Nowlin started the book talking about the tragedy that drives the book forward. It would’ve been much more entertaining to me to not know about this thing that literally destroys Autumn and just find out when she finds out in the book. It felt like a prologue and I don’t like prologues. Also, why did Laura Nowlin have to do that to me…. It hurt. Like, bad bad.

Spoilers ahead.

Is it just me, or is it always the nice person, the kind and caring and considerate person, who dies a tragic and early death?? Literally my least favorite trope of all time. Why does the nice person have to die. It makes no sense to me. Maybe because I feel like the nice person in my own story, so I’m just sitting here thinking, “Oh, yeah, my tragically young death is right around the corner.” It just sucks. Kind people never get their happily ever afters. Finny deserved it more than anyone so it really pisses me off that he was the one who had to die.

Also, I totally guessed that she was gonna get pregnant with his baby. Not surprising in the least and felt more like a letdown than anything.

Overall, despite my rantings, this book definitely deserves 4.5 stars (rounded to 5 for Goodreads). I think it’s definitely worth the hype, but don’t read it if you’re prone to crying and depressing things make you rethink your life choices. This book is 100% depressing and will make you wonder why you’ve made the decisions you’ve made. To be honest, though, if you’re a glutton for depressing books like I am, you’ll love it 🙂

Source: Personal Copy

“Sometimes I am disappointed with love. I thought that when you were in love, it would always be right there, staring you in the face, reminding you every moment that you love this person. It seems that it isn’t always like that.”

– laura nowlin, if he had been with me, 2 thoughts on “ book review: if he had been with me by laura nowlin ”.

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Book Review: If He Had Been with Me

by The Snug Bookworm | Apr 28, 2023 | Book Reviews , Young Adult

Preview of If He Had Been with Me Review

In today’s blog post, I want to share with you an achingly authentic and raw book: If He Had Been with Me by Laura Nowlin . This coming-of-age story is about two high school friends, Autumn and Finny, and their experiences with friendship, love, and loss. The story takes place in a small Midwestern town and deeply connects with anyone who has gone through the ups and downs of growing up and dealing with relationships.

If He Had Been with Me offers a raw portrait of love and regret that reflects the relationships we hold closest to our hearts. Its genuine portrayal of the complexities of friendship and love makes it a powerful read that will resonate with many readers. If you enjoy fiction, coming-of-age stories, or just want a truly emotional reading experience, I strongly recommend you check out this book.

Tropes in this Book

Childhood friends
Friends to lovers
Miscommunication
Love triangle

If He Had Been with Me Summary

If He Had Been with Me presents an authentic and raw portrait of the complexities of friendship, love, and loss during high school. Set in a small Midwestern town, this New York Times bestseller centers around Autumn and Finny, next-door neighbors and lifelong friends whose mothers are best friends. Born just a week apart, their bond is tested by life’s challenges and changes, including navigating school, societal expectations, and their own evolving emotions.

During their middle school years, Autumn and Finny drift apart, finding new friends and seemingly fitting into different social circles. However, their friendship keeps asserting through shared holiday gatherings, parties, and random encounters. As they grow older, Autumn and Finn rediscover their connection during the summer after graduation, just as Finny faces a life-altering impact.

The novel follows the tragic consequences of their decisions, both made and unmade, as these events shape their lives irrevocably. With the raw emotions of life and mortality at the forefront, Autumn and Finny confront the harsh realities of existence and find strength in each other and within themselves.

Thoughts and Feelings

Reading If He Had Been with Me was an emotional adventure that touched my heart and left a strong impression on me. Laura Nowlin created an authentic and honest story about the ups and downs of friendship, love, and loss. As I read the book, I felt a strong connection to Autumn and Finny as they went through life’s challenges together. How the characters’ feelings were described made it easy for me to understand and relate to their struggles and victories.

What stood out to me most in the book was the realistic way the relationships between the characters were shown. Autumn and Finny’s friendship was captivating, and it was amazing to see how close they remained as they grew up. The other characters in the story, like Sylvie, Maya, and even Autumn’s boyfriend, Jamie, added more depth and made the story even more interesting. Their growth and interactions throughout the book showed how vital our connections with others can be.

The novel’s feeling was a mix of sadness and hope, as the characters faced challenging situations but still found beauty in life. As a reader, the book made me think about my own experiences and relationships and consider my life choices. If He Had Been with Me encouraged me to be grateful for the people in my life and to value the connections I’ve made, even when life gets complicated.

Final Thoughts

This unforgettable coming-of-age novel is something you won’t want to miss. The characters, especially the main character Autumn, are easy to relate to, and their challenges feel real. Laura Nowlin’s excellent storytelling brings out all the emotions, so you can’t help but get deeply invested in the characters’ lives.

The book’s emotional depth delves into profound themes of love, friendship, and personal growth, evoking a powerful and moving experience. However, what truly sets this book apart is its distinctive perspective on friendship, skillfully intertwining elements of sadness and hope to create a captivating balance.

Nowlin’s use of symbols, images, and how she shows grief and loss leaves the novel with a lasting impression. She avoids clichés when talking about relationships and instead goes deep into the details of friendship, love, and loss, making the story both engaging and emotionally powerful.

I recommend If He Had Been with Me to fans of literary fiction, coming-of-age stories, and anyone who has gone through the ups and downs of teenage friendships or one-sided love.

If you found this review helpful, you can check out the book at Bookshop.org here and support local bookstores along the way!

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If he had been with me by laura nowlin - review, summary, analysis & facts.

1. book details, 2. synopsis, 4. analysis (symbols, themes etc), 6. about the author, 7. book club questions, 8. reading plan, 9. facts & curiosities, 11. books related, full title:.

If He Had Been with Me

Young Adult Contemporary Fiction

Number of Pages:

Author - who wrote, laura nowlin, publication date:.

April 1, 2013

Country & Original Language:

United States; English

The story is set in a high school environment, exploring the lives of the characters within the context of their school and personal relationships.

Point of View:

The novel is written in the first-person point of view, primarily from the perspective of the main character, Autumn.

Characters:

The main characters include Autumn and Finny, best friends who navigate the challenges of high school and friendship. The novel features a cast of supporting characters who play significant roles in the protagonists' lives.

"If He Had Been with Me" by Laura Nowlin follows the story of two best friends, Autumn and Finny, as they navigate the complexities of high school, friendship, and love. Told from the perspective of Autumn, the novel explores the deep bond between the two friends and the unspoken feelings that linger beneath the surface.

Autumn and Finny have been inseparable since childhood, sharing a close friendship that seems unbreakable. However, as they enter their senior year of high school, they find themselves facing new challenges and changes. Autumn is introspective and contemplative, while Finny is outgoing and charismatic. The dynamics of their friendship are put to the test as they grapple with the expectations of adulthood and the uncertain future that lies ahead.

The title, "If He Had Been with Me," suggests a contemplation of alternate possibilities and what-ifs. As Autumn reflects on their relationship, readers are taken on an emotional journey, exploring themes of self-discovery, love, and the impact of choices on the course of one's life.

The novel delves into the intricacies of teenage emotions and the significance of relationships during a pivotal time in one's life. Laura Nowlin's storytelling captures the poignant moments of adolescence and the bittersweet realization that some things can never be the same. "If He Had Been with Me" is a heartfelt and thought-provoking exploration of friendship, love, and the complexities of growing up.

"If He Had Been with Me" by Laura Nowlin is a poignant and introspective young adult novel that explores the intricacies of friendship, love, and self-discovery during the tumultuous time of adolescence. At the heart of the story are two best friends, Autumn and Finny, who have been inseparable since childhood. The narrative unfolds through the eyes of Autumn as she reflects on their journey, contemplating the unspoken feelings and the potential impact of choices on the trajectory of their lives.

The novel begins with Autumn, a reflective and observant teenager, contemplating the nature of friendships and relationships. She introduces readers to Finny, the charismatic and outgoing friend who has always been by her side. Despite their differences in personalities, their friendship has endured, providing a sense of security and familiarity in the unpredictable landscape of high school.

As the story progresses, the characters find themselves in their senior year, a time marked by transitions and uncertainties. Autumn is at a crossroads, grappling with her identity and the expectations placed upon her by society, family, and herself. Finny, on the other hand, embraces life with enthusiasm and a carefree spirit. The contrast in their personalities becomes more pronounced as they navigate the challenges of adolescence, relationships, and the looming prospect of graduation.

The title, "If He Had Been with Me," serves as a thematic undercurrent throughout the narrative. It introduces a speculative element, prompting readers to consider alternate scenarios and the impact of pivotal moments. This speculative angle becomes more pronounced as Autumn and Finny's lives take unexpected turns, leading to moments of reflection on what might have been.

The core of the novel lies in the exploration of unspoken emotions and the complexities of friendship evolving into something more. Autumn grapples with her feelings for Finny, emotions that have been buried beneath the surface for years. Nowlin delicately navigates the nuances of unrequited love, allowing readers to empathize with Autumn's internal struggles.

The high school setting serves as a backdrop for the characters' growth and self-discovery. Nowlin captures the essence of teenage emotions, portraying the insecurities, hopes, and dreams that define this pivotal stage in life. The exploration of friendship dynamics is nuanced and authentic, delving into the challenges of evolving relationships and the impact of societal expectations.

Throughout the novel, the author weaves a narrative that is both introspective and emotionally resonant. The prose is lyrical and reflective, inviting readers to connect with the characters on a profound level. Autumn's internal monologue provides insight into her thoughts and emotions, creating a narrative intimacy that enhances the reader's engagement with the story.

The relationships portrayed in the novel extend beyond the central friendship, encompassing family dynamics and secondary characters who contribute to the protagonists' personal growth. Themes of acceptance, forgiveness, and understanding permeate the narrative, adding layers of depth to the characters' experiences.

As the story reaches its climax, the speculative element of the narrative comes to the forefront. Autumn confronts pivotal moments in her relationship with Finny, leading to a profound exploration of the choices that shape our lives. The novel invites readers to reflect on the impact of decisions and the interconnectedness of seemingly unrelated events.

The resolution of the story is both poignant and thought-provoking. Without giving away spoilers, it navigates the delicate balance between heartbreak and acceptance. The characters undergo significant growth, and the narrative concludes with a sense of closure that is both satisfying and emotionally resonant.

In summary, "If He Had Been with Me" is a beautifully crafted novel that delves into the complexities of friendship, love, and self-discovery. Laura Nowlin's exploration of teenage emotions and relationships is nuanced and authentic, capturing the essence of adolescence with grace and sensitivity. The speculative element adds a unique dimension to the narrative, prompting readers to reflect on the choices that define our paths. It is a coming-of-age story that resonates on a deep emotional level, leaving a lasting impression on those who immerse themselves in its pages.

"If He Had Been with Me" by Laura Nowlin is a nuanced exploration of friendship, love, and self-discovery within the context of adolescence. The novel delves into the complexities of relationships, offering a thoughtful and introspective narrative that engages readers on both an emotional and intellectual level.

Friendship and Love:

The novel prominently explores the theme of friendship and the complexities that arise when deeper emotions, such as romantic love, are involved. It delves into the challenges and nuances of navigating these emotions within the context of a close friendship.

Identity and Self-Discovery:

Identity and self-discovery are central themes in the narrative. The characters, particularly Autumn, undergo a journey of self-exploration, grappling with questions of who they are, what they want, and how they fit into the world around them.

Choices and Consequences:

The speculative element introduced by the title prompts an exploration of the theme of choices and their consequences. The narrative encourages readers to reflect on the pivotal moments that shape the characters' lives and how different decisions could lead to alternate outcomes.

Coming-of-Age:

The novel is a coming-of-age story that captures the essence of adolescence. It explores the challenges, growth, and self-discovery that occur during the transition from youth to adulthood. Themes of identity, independence, and the inevitability of change are woven throughout the narrative.

Loss and Acceptance:

The theme of loss and acceptance is subtly present in the narrative. Characters grapple with the loss of innocence, the shifting dynamics of relationships, and the acceptance of change as they confront the realities of growing up.

The Treehouse:

The treehouse serves as a symbolic space of refuge and shared memories for the characters. It represents the sanctuary of their friendship, a place where secrets are shared and a tangible symbol of the enduring bond they've built over the years.

The Photo Album:

The photo album symbolizes the preservation of memories. It becomes a poignant symbol of the characters' shared history, allowing them to revisit moments that shaped their friendship. The act of flipping through the pages becomes a means of reflection and nostalgia.

The prom is a symbolic event in the novel, representing a traditional milestone in the characters' high school experience. It becomes a backdrop for significant moments, symbolizing the transition from adolescence to adulthood, and highlighting the emotions and expectations associated with such rites of passage.

The beach symbolizes a space of contemplation and emotional intensity. Scenes set at the beach often carry symbolic weight, representing the vastness of possibilities, the transient nature of time, and the emotional ebbs and flows experienced by the characters.

The Title - "If He Had Been with Me":

The title itself serves as a symbolic exploration of alternate realities and the impact of pivotal moments. It encapsulates the theme of "what if," prompting readers to consider the significance of certain events and the potential for different outcomes.

Character Development:

The strength of the novel lies in its well-crafted characters, particularly the protagonists, Autumn and Finny. Nowlin carefully develops their personalities, allowing readers to connect with their individual struggles, fears, and desires. The characters undergo significant growth throughout the narrative, mirroring the transformative nature of the teenage years. Autumn's internal monologue provides a window into her evolving emotions, creating a relatable and authentic portrayal of adolescent introspection.

Autumn: Autumn, the protagonist, serves as the lens through which readers experience the story. She is introspective, thoughtful, and carries a deep well of emotions. Her narrative voice provides insight into the complexities of teenage emotions, self-discovery, and the challenges of growing up. Autumn grapples with her evolving feelings for Finny and undergoes significant personal growth as she navigates the uncertainties of her senior year. Her internal conflicts and vulnerability make her a relatable and empathetic character.

Finny: Finny, Autumn's best friend, is a charismatic and carefree individual. His outgoing nature contrasts with Autumn's introspection, creating a dynamic and complementary friendship. Finny's presence is central to the novel, and his impact on Autumn's life sparks the speculative element of the narrative. Finny represents the unpredictability of life and serves as a catalyst for Autumn's self-discovery. The complexities of their friendship and the unspoken emotions between them add layers to Finny's character.

Secondary Characters: The novel introduces a cast of secondary characters, including friends, family members, and classmates, each contributing to the protagonists' personal growth. These characters represent different facets of the teenage experience, such as peer dynamics, familial expectations, and societal pressures. Their interactions with Autumn and Finny add depth to the narrative, highlighting the interconnected nature of relationships.

Family Members: Autumn's relationship with her family members, especially her sister and parents, adds another layer to her character. The family dynamics contribute to the exploration of identity and the influence of external expectations on individual choices. The portrayal of familial relationships provides context for Autumn's personal journey and the challenges she faces in expressing her true self.

Symbolic Significance: The characters themselves serve as symbols within the narrative. Autumn and Finny represent the complexities of friendship and the blurred lines between platonic and romantic feelings. Their shared history, embodied in the treehouse and the photo album, symbolizes the depth of their connection. The title itself, "If He Had Been with Me," symbolically encapsulates the speculative nature of the narrative, inviting readers to contemplate the impact of pivotal moments on the characters' lives.

Character Growth: A notable aspect of the novel is the characters' growth throughout the narrative. Autumn undergoes a significant transformation, coming to terms with her emotions and learning to navigate the complexities of relationships. Finny's character also experiences development, and the resolution provides a sense of closure for both protagonists.

Speculative Element:

The inclusion of a speculative element, suggested by the title, adds a layer of complexity to the narrative. The "what if" scenarios prompt readers to reflect on the impact of choices and the interconnectedness of events. This thematic undercurrent enhances the story's depth, encouraging readers to engage with the characters' dilemmas and contemplate the alternate paths that could have unfolded.

Emotional Resonance:

Nowlin's writing style contributes significantly to the emotional resonance of the novel. The prose is lyrical and reflective, capturing the emotional nuances of the characters' experiences. The first-person point of view allows for an intimate connection with Autumn, fostering empathy and understanding. The author's ability to convey the depth of emotions adds a layer of authenticity to the narrative, making it a powerful and evocative reading experience.

Resolution and Closure:

The resolution of the narrative is both satisfying and thought-provoking. Without succumbing to clichés, Nowlin navigates the complexities of relationships and personal growth, providing a conclusion that resonates with authenticity. The novel's conclusion offers a sense of closure while leaving room for readers to reflect on the broader themes presented throughout the story.

Laura Nowlin's "If He Had Been with Me" is a poignant and thought-provoking exploration of the complexities of teenage emotions, friendship, and the profound impact of pivotal moments. This novel is highly recommended for readers who appreciate nuanced coming-of-age stories that delve into the intricacies of relationships and self-discovery.

The heart of the narrative revolves around the enduring friendship between Autumn and Finny, two characters whose dynamics evolve as they navigate the challenges of high school and the uncertainties of their senior year. What sets this book apart is its ability to capture the essence of adolescence, portraying the characters' internal struggles and emotional growth with authenticity.

The speculative element introduced by the title, prompting readers to consider alternate possibilities, adds a layer of depth to the narrative. This thematic exploration invites reflection on the significance of choices and the interconnectedness of moments, making it a compelling and intellectually engaging read.

The characters are skillfully crafted, with Autumn serving as a relatable protagonist whose introspective narrative provides a window into the tumultuous world of teenage emotions. Finny's charismatic and carefree personality adds a dynamic element to their friendship, creating a narrative tension that keeps the reader invested in their journey.

This novel is recommended for a broad audience, including young adult readers and those who appreciate literary fiction that explores the human experience. It will resonate with anyone who has navigated the complexities of friendship and love during their formative years. The universal themes of identity, self-discovery, and the inevitable changes that come with growing up make it a relatable and enriching read.

Nowlin's writing style is both evocative and immersive, allowing readers to empathize with the characters' joys, sorrows, and moments of reflection. The symbolism woven throughout the narrative, such as the treehouse and the photo album, adds layers of meaning and enhances the overall reading experience.

In conclusion, "If He Had Been with Me" is worth reading for its beautifully rendered exploration of the human condition. Laura Nowlin's ability to capture the emotional complexities of adolescence, coupled with the novel's philosophical undertones, makes it a compelling and rewarding literary journey. Whether you're a fan of young adult fiction or enjoy stories that delve into the profound aspects of relationships and self-discovery, this novel is a must-read. It leaves a lasting impact, prompting readers to reflect on their own journey through the lens of Autumn and Finny's captivating story.

About the Author:

Laura Nowlin is an accomplished author known for her heartfelt and introspective explorations of young adult themes. With a keen understanding of the complexities of adolescence, Nowlin weaves narratives that resonate with readers of all ages.

A graduate in English Literature from Dickinson College, Nowlin's passion for storytelling emerged early in her life. Her ability to capture the nuances of human emotions and relationships is reflected in her debut novel, "If He Had Been with Me." This poignant coming-of-age story garnered praise for its authentic portrayal of friendship, love, and self-discovery.

Nowlin's writing style is characterized by its lyrical prose and thoughtful introspection, inviting readers to connect with the characters on a deep emotional level. Her exploration of speculative elements in storytelling adds a unique dimension to her work, prompting readers to contemplate the profound impact of choices and alternate possibilities.

In addition to her writing, Nowlin is actively involved in literary communities, participating in discussions on the transformative power of literature. Her commitment to engaging with readers extends beyond the pages of her books, creating a lasting connection with those who appreciate the depth and authenticity of her storytelling.

As a novelist dedicated to capturing the essence of the human experience, Laura Nowlin continues to contribute to the rich tapestry of contemporary literature. Her work invites readers to reflect on their own journeys and connect with the universal themes of love, friendship, and self-discovery. With each novel, Nowlin reaffirms her position as a storyteller who understands the emotional landscapes of her characters and the readers who embark on their journeys with them.

"If He Had Been with Me" by Laura Nowlin Book Club Questions Suggestions:

Friendship Dynamics:

How would you describe the friendship between Autumn and Finny? How do their personalities complement or contrast each other? How does their friendship evolve throughout the novel?

Unspoken Emotions:

The novel explores the theme of unspoken emotions within friendships. Have you ever experienced a similar situation in your own life? How do the characters' unexpressed feelings contribute to the tension and depth of the story?

The title suggests a "what if" scenario. How did the speculative element of the narrative impact your reading experience? Did it lead you to reflect on pivotal moments in your own life?

Coming-of-Age Themes:

In what ways does the novel capture the essence of adolescence and the challenges of growing up? How do the characters navigate issues of identity, self-discovery, and societal expectations?

Symbolism - The Treehouse and Photo Album:

Explore the symbolic significance of the treehouse and the photo album in the novel. How do these elements represent the characters' shared history and the depth of their connection?

Consider the choices made by the characters and the consequences that follow. How do these decisions shape the trajectory of their lives? Are there moments you can relate to in your own experiences?

The Title - Alternative Realities:

The title, "If He Had Been with Me," introduces a speculative element. How does the title impact your interpretation of the novel? How might the story have unfolded differently if certain choices were made?

Character Growth:

Reflect on the personal growth of the main characters, particularly Autumn. How do their experiences throughout the novel contribute to their development? In what ways do they confront and overcome challenges?

Family Dynamics:

How are family relationships portrayed in the novel? Consider Autumn's interactions with her family and the influence of familial expectations on her decisions.

Themes of Love and Romance:

Discuss the exploration of love and romance in the novel. How are these themes intertwined with the central friendship? How does the author navigate the complexities of these emotions?

Closure and Resolution:

What are your thoughts on the resolution of the novel? Did it provide a satisfying sense of closure, or were there aspects you wished were explored further?

Author's Style and Impact:

How would you describe Laura Nowlin's writing style? In what ways does her prose contribute to the emotional resonance of the novel? How has the book impacted your perspective on friendship and love?

Day 1-2: Read Chapters 1-10 (Approximately 60 pages)

Day 3-4: Read Chapters 11-20 (Approximately 60 pages)

Day 5-7: Read Chapters 21-30 (Approximately 60 pages)

Day 8-9: Read Chapters 31-40 (Approximately 60 pages)

Day 10-11: Read Chapters 41-50 (Approximately 60 pages)

Day 12-14: Read Chapters 51-60 (Approximately 60 pages)

Day 15-16: Read Chapters 61-70 (Approximately 60 pages)

Day 17-18: Read Chapters 71-80 (Approximately 60 pages)

Day 19-21: Read Chapters 81-End (Approximately 56 pages)

Inspiration for the Title:

The title "If He Had Been with Me" immediately sparks curiosity, prompting readers to contemplate alternative scenarios. Titles with speculative elements often engage readers' imaginations before they even open the book.

Music References:

Consider exploring any music references within the novel. Sometimes authors incorporate music into their works to enhance the emotional atmosphere. If there are specific songs or artists mentioned, listening to them might provide additional insights into the characters' emotions.

Author's Writing Process:

Laura Nowlin, like many authors, likely had a unique writing process for the book. Understanding her approach to crafting characters, developing plotlines, or incorporating symbolic elements can provide insights into the creative journey behind the novel.

Reader Discussions and Theories:

Joining book forums or discussion groups can reveal fascinating reader theories and interpretations. People often bring diverse perspectives to the table, sparking intriguing conversations about character motivations, plot twists, and the novel's broader themes.

Book Club Conversations:

If you're part of a book club, the discussions generated by the group can lead to interesting revelations. Different readers may resonate with various aspects of the story, and these conversations can deepen your understanding of the novel.

Exploring Similar Themes in Other Works:

If you enjoyed the themes of friendship, love, and self-discovery in "If He Had Been with Me," you might find it interesting to explore other books or films that delve into similar themes. Comparing and contrasting different narratives can provide a broader perspective on the subject matter.

Author's Other Works:

Investigate other works by Laura Nowlin. Understanding an author's body of work can reveal recurring themes, writing styles, or narrative techniques. If you enjoyed this novel, you might find her other works equally engaging.

Reader Reactions and Reviews:

Reading reviews or reactions from other readers can be enlightening. People often share personal connections to the story, discuss favorite scenes, or debate key plot points. This can give you a sense of the book's impact on a diverse audience.

1. What is the significance of the speculative element introduced by the title?

The speculative element prompts readers to consider alternate scenarios and what-ifs in the characters' lives. The title invites reflection on the impact of pivotal moments and choices, adding a layer of depth to the narrative.

2. How would you describe the writing style of Laura Nowlin in this book?

Laura Nowlin's writing style is lyrical and reflective, capturing the emotional nuances of the characters' experiences. The first-person perspective allows for an intimate connection with the protagonist, Autumn.

3. What themes are explored in "If He Had Been with Me"?

The novel delves into themes of friendship, love, self-discovery, and the coming-of-age experience. It also explores the consequences of choices and the impact of unspoken emotions within relationships.

4. Are there any significant symbols or motifs in the book?

Yes, symbols such as the treehouse and the photo album are used to represent the characters' shared history and the depth of their connection. These elements carry symbolic weight throughout the narrative.

If you enjoyed "If He Had Been with Me" by Laura Nowlin and are looking for books with similar themes of friendship, love, and coming-of-age, here are some recommendations:

"The Perks of Being a Wallflower" by Stephen Chbosky:

This coming-of-age novel follows Charlie as he navigates high school, friendships, and personal challenges. Like Nowlin's work, it explores the emotional complexities of adolescence.

"Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe" by Benjamin Alire Sáenz:

A heartfelt story of friendship and self-discovery, this novel revolves around the deepening bond between two boys as they navigate their identities, family dynamics, and the secrets of the universe.

"Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda" by Becky Albertalli:

This novel combines themes of friendship, love, and self-acceptance. Simon, the protagonist, grapples with his identity as a gay teenager while navigating the challenges of high school and relationships.

"To All the Boys I've Loved Before" by Jenny Han:

Jenny Han's contemporary novel follows Lara Jean Covey as her life takes a turn when her secret love letters are unexpectedly sent out. The story explores themes of love, family, and self-discovery.

"Eleanor Oliphant Is Completely Fine" by Gail Honeyman:

While not a young adult novel, this book delves into themes of loneliness, friendship, and personal growth. Eleanor's journey toward self-discovery is both heartwarming and thought-provoking.

"They Both Die at the End" by Adam Silvera:

This novel explores the impact of knowing one's death date and follows two characters who connect on their final day. Themes of friendship, love, and living life to the fullest are central to the narrative.

"One of Us Is Lying" by Karen M. McManus:

A contemporary mystery that also touches on themes of friendship and secrets, this novel follows a group of high school students dealing with the aftermath of a classmate's death.

"Everything, Everything" by Nicola Yoon:

This novel tells the story of a girl with a rare illness that confines her to her home. When she falls in love with the boy next door, it explores themes of love, risk-taking, and the pursuit of a meaningful life.

"We Were Liars" by E. Lockhart:

A suspenseful novel with a strong focus on friendship and family dynamics. The story follows a group of privileged friends as they navigate a tragedy that alters their lives.

"The Fault in Our Stars" by John Green:

A poignant love story that deals with themes of illness, friendship, and the search for meaning. John Green's writing resonates with emotional depth and authenticity.

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If he had been with me.

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Parents Say 8 Reviews
Kids Say 17 Reviews

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Based on 8 parent reviews

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The story was good. It honestly took a little bit to get into it, but it was pretty good after I did! It does have sexual themes/references throughout the book as well as some underage drinking, death, teen pregnancy and mentions of suicide. CH. 15- teens sit together in their bathing suits, his hand tucked inside her bikini top. CH. 21, pg 104 is a little more descriptive. The teens are in a car and she lets him touch her breast and slide his finger inside her. CH. 42 is a pool make out scene where he ultimately wants to have sex but she won’t do it. CH. 81 has a sex scene, most of it is on pages 364-367. The rest of the chapter the teens lay in bed together and talk, a couple times it’s mentioned that they’re not wearing clothes. Ch. 82- there’s brief mention that the characters aren’t wearing anything.

There are 4 total F words throughout as well as multiple misuses of God’s name and mild language.

Too much swearing
Great role models
Educational value

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Review : If he had been with me, Laura Nowlin

December 8, 2014

If you’re not an amateur of books that make you tear up , or if you’re just not that into high-school-first-sweethearts-best-friends-forever kind of thing, this book isn’t worth your time. If that’s not your case, then stop immediately everything you’re doing to pick up that wonderful first book from a promising young adult author. I swear you won’t regret it.

This book broke my heart , litteraly. In a million tiny little pieces. I’m not gonna give out any spoilers, because let’s face it, it’s funnier to watch you get your heart broken, too. If he had been with me is the story of Autumn and Finn, two childhood bestfriends, who slowly grow apart as high school comes, and life happens. Right from the start, you find yourself in a poignant prose that is in fact, an insight of what’s going to happen. The story follows on as flashbacks into the life of Autumn and Finn, their stories, their friendship as it complicates around other friendships and love stories. Somehow, Nowlin’s prose keeps you reading, as the story becomes more and more poignant, and leading to an ending you could have seen coming. But, too busy closing your eyes, deep into the story and the feelings of the characters, you’ll find yourself falling over the edge. This is a heart-breaking story, let me warn you, but this isn’t one to be missed. The author’s writing is like a poem, like a sip of alcohol, bittersweet on your tongue, and leaving you the next morning a little lost and confused about what happened.

If he had been with me is definitely a story i look forward to reading again, well, maybe in a few months, the cut is still too deep for now. I look forward to reading more from Laura Nowlin, and i hope you are, too ! Her next book , This Song Is (Not) For You , is expected in spring 2015.

PS. Laura is a really nice person, too, and close to her readers, you can reach out to her on her twitter account , and on goodreads , she even answers questions!

If he had been with me everything would have been different… I wasn’t with Finn on that August night. But I should’ve been. It was raining, of course. And he and Sylvie were arguing as he drove down the slick road. No one ever says what they were arguing about. Other people think it’s not important. They do not know there is another story. The story that lurks between the facts. What they do not know—the cause of the argument—is crucial. So let me tell you…

Keep on reading! You might also enjoy:

[…] Laura Nowlin, author of “If he had been with me” […]

[…] one book that you’ve read but no one else has? Hm, I haven’t met a lot of people who read If he had been with me (Laura Nowlin). And honestly guys, check it out : it’s […]

[…] I know. I cared so deeply for the characters of this book, Autumn, and Finn. Despite the fact that this book broke my heart, I would love to see how life turns out now, for those […]

[…] book I read? If he had been with me. Why I love her? I fell in love with her oh, so beautiful writing, and this particular story she […]

[…] • Autumn & Finny, If he had been with me, Laura […]

[…] As one of my favorite debut authors, Laura Nowlin has to be put on that list. She loves books, and she wrote an amazing one, obviously I would love to meet her and tell her how much I loved If he had been with me. […]

[…] 7 • Laura Nowlin, If He Had Been With Me […]

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If he had been with me.

“If He Had Been With Me” delves into the intricate lives of Autumn and Finn, childhood friends whose journey through love, loss, and self-discovery is at the heart of the narrative. Autumn, portrayed as a thoughtful and introspective young woman, sets the stage by reflecting deeply on her life and the defining moments that have shaped her. Her introspection serves not only to illuminate her own character but also to unravel the complexities of their shared experiences. As the story unfolds, their relationship becomes a lens through which themes of friendship, resilience, and personal growth are explored, inviting readers into a world where emotional truths resonate deeply and the paths to understanding oneself and others intertwine in unexpected ways.

“I love him in a way I cannot define, as if my love were an organ within my body that I could not live without yet could not pick out of an anatomy book.” Laura Nowlin Tweet

Author Profile

Laura Nowlin has a Bachelor of Arts degree in English with a specialization in Creative Writing from Missouri State University. When Laura is not at home, deeply contemplating her own novels, she is employed at the public library, where the users provide her with plenty inspiration for her writing. She resides in St. Louis alongside her family.

15 Lessons from the book If He Had Been with Me by Laura Nowlin

Friendship: The significance of profound and meaningful relationships and their potential to profoundly influence our lives.
Self-discovery is a common theme in young adult literature, as characters embark on a journey to get a deeper understanding of themselves and their personal beliefs.
Communication: The importance of transparent and sincere communication in relationships, particularly when confronted with difficulties.
Loss and Grief: Addressing loss and the process of grieving is a prevalent topic in young adult fiction, aiding readers in navigating these emotional experiences.
Individuality refers to the act of accepting and embracing one’s own characteristics and remaining authentic to oneself.
Empathy refers to the ability to comprehend and share the feelings and viewpoints of others, even when they differ from our own.
Identity: The process of self-discovery and understanding, encompassing elements such as gender, sexuality, and individual convictions.
Resilience refers to the ability to overcome challenges and setbacks, demonstrating the determination and fortitude to persist.
Acceptance: The significance of embracing oneself and others, including their imperfections.
Analyzing the intricacies of familial connections and their influence on individual development: A study of family dynamics.
Love and Relationships: Examining various manifestations of love and the difficulties associated with romantic partnerships.
Courage is the act of confronting worries and venturing beyond one’s comfort zone in order to accomplish individual aspirations.
Forgiveness entails the process of pardoning oneself and others for errors and deficiencies.
Independence: Cultivating a strong sense of self-reliance and self-governance, particularly throughout the transition into adulthood.
The concept of life’s impermanence involves recognizing the fleeting nature of existence and valuing the significant moments and connections that have the most importance.

My Thoughts

Autumn and Finn, childhood friends bonded by shared memories and the passage of time, embark on a poignant journey through the complexities of love, loss, and self-discovery. Autumn, characterized by her introspective nature, anchors the narrative with her thoughtful reflections on life’s twists and turns. As the story unfolds, their relationship becomes a canvas for exploring profound themes of emotional connection and resilience in the face of adversity.

4.2 out of 5 out of 42,230 ratings

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If He Had Been With Me Book Review

I love a solid romance story. In several book groups, I saw plenty of people recommend If He Had Been With Me by Laura Nowlin. It has well over 30,000 reviews on Amazon and over 250,000 on Goodreads, so I included this book on my 24 books in 2024.

If He Had Been With Me by Laura Nowlin

If he had been with me , everything would have been different… Autumn and Finn used to be inseparable. But then something changed. Or they changed. Now, they do their best to ignore each other. Autumn has her boyfriend Jamie, and her close-knit group of friends. And Finn has become that boy at school, the one everyone wants to be around. That still doesn’t stop the way Autumn feels every time she and Finn cross paths, and the growing, nagging thought that maybe things could have been different. Maybe they should be together. But come August, things will change forever. And as time passes, Autumn will be forced to confront how else life might have been different if they had never parted ways…

My Review of If He Had Been With Me Book

If He Had Been With Me has a good storyline. However, there are times when the story gets a bit boring. It could be because the story didn’t always follow the storyline like it should have. It’s like we skipped to different events unexpectedly.

It’s a typical high-school love story, but it’s also one about unrequited love. This is mainly because the characters didn’t tell each other how they felt when they had the chance. Sometimes, teenagers struggle with expressing themselves to the point that they miss out on opportunities to have authentic relationships. This book makes one think about how they express their feelings to those they love.

While you may know what is coming in the book, you still hope that If He Had Been With Me will give you a different ending. If you decide to join the thousands of us who have read this book, be sure you have tissues when you get to the end!

This was a solid read, and I still recommend it. If you need a tear-jerker, this is it.

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If He Had Been with Me Summary, Characters, and Book Club Questions

By Med Kharbach, PhD | Published: December 27, 2023 | Updated: July 29, 2024

Today, I’m diving into a compelling novel that has been making waves in the world of young adult literature : “If He Had Been with Me” by Laura Nowlin. This book has not only captivated a vast audience but also achieved remarkable accolades, including becoming a New York Times Bestseller and a sensation on BookTok. Aimed at fans of emotional YA stories, this novel offers a profound exploration of teenage love, the complexities of growing up, and the enduring question of “what if.”

Our discussion of “If He Had Been with Me” will proceed as follow: I first provide a summary of the novel, then I move on to discuss the characters that bring the thematic plot to life and explore their dynamics, and finally conclude with thought-provoking book club questions.

If He Had Been with Me Summary

“ If He Had Been with Me ,” by Laura Nowlin is a compelling exploration of love, regret, and the impact of choices on our lives. This New York Times Bestseller and BookTok sensation resonates with fans of emotionally rich young adult fiction.

The story centers on Autumn and Finn, childhood friends who drift apart in high school. Autumn, in a relationship with Jamie, can’t shake her feelings for Finn, who has become the popular boy at school. Their occasional interactions spark questions of “what if,” reflecting on past choices and potential futures.

As the narrative builds towards a pivotal moment in August, Autumn is forced to confront the reality of their relationship and her own emotions. The novel skillfully portrays the complexities of teenage romance and the bittersweet nature of growing up.

Nowlin’s masterful depiction of complex emotional landscapes and the consequences of choices makes this a compelling read. Its popularity on platforms like TikTok highlights its relevance to modern audiences, particularly those drawn to contemporary teen romance and emotionally charged storytelling.

Related: Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret Summary

If He Had Been with Me Characters

The primary characters in “If He Had Been with Me” include:

Autumn – She is the protagonist of the novel, navigating the complexities of her feelings and relationships. Autumn is introspective and deals with the emotional turmoil of her unexpressed feelings for Finn, her childhood friend, while being in a relationship with Jamie.
Finn – Finn is Autumn’s childhood friend and the focal point of her emotional journey. Over the years, he becomes popular in school and seems to be the center of everyone’s attention. His relationship with Autumn is complex, marked by a shared history and unspoken emotions.
Jamie – Jamie is Autumn’s boyfriend, a significant character in the novel. His relationship with Autumn adds another layer to the emotional dynamics of the story.

In addition to these central characters, the book also features a close-knit group of friends who play a role in the narrative, contributing to the social and emotional backdrop against which the story unfolds. These characters help to flesh out the world of the novel, providing context and contrast to the main relationships.

Book Club Questions

Here are some questions tailored for an insightful book club meeting:

Character Analysis and Development

How do Autumn and Finn’s characters develop throughout the novel? Discuss the significance of their evolution from childhood friends to the complexity of their relationship in their teenage years.
In what ways do the secondary characters, like Jamie, influence Autumn and Finn’s story? Do they add depth to the main narrative, and how?

Themes and Motifs

The theme of “what if” permeates the novel. How does this theme affect your reading of Autumn and Finn’s relationship? Can you relate to this sentiment in your own life experiences?
Discuss the portrayal of love and regret in the book. How do these themes impact the characters’ decisions and the story’s outcome?

Narrative and Structure

The story builds towards a pivotal moment in August. How did this narrative structure—leading up to a crucial point—affect your anticipation and reading experience?
The novel is a poignant exploration of teenage romance and the transition to adulthood. How does the author use narrative techniques to capture the bittersweet nature of growing up?

Emotional Impact and Reader Experience

Which part of the novel was the most emotionally impactful for you, and why?
How does the author’s portrayal of complex emotional landscapes facilitate a deeper connection with the characters?

Comparative Analysis

For those familiar with works by Colleen Hoover, Jenny Han, or similar authors, how does “If He Had Been with Me” compare in its exploration of young love and emotional growth?
The novel has been popular on BookTok and among contemporary readers. In what ways do you think it resonates with a modern audience, especially those who enjoy emotionally charged narratives?

Personal Reflection and Application

Have you ever experienced a “what if” moment in your life that parallels the experiences of Autumn and Finn? How did it shape your decisions and perspective?
Reflecting on the ending, how do you interpret the choices made by Autumn and Finn? Were there moments in the book where you wished they had made different decisions?

Cultural and Social Reflection

The novel touches on the dynamics of high school social life and popularity. How does this portrayal reflect larger societal issues or dynamics? Are these representations realistic?
Discuss how the book addresses the theme of self-discovery in the context of teenage years. What does it reveal about the challenges and pressures faced by young adults today?

Final thoughts

To wrap up, “ If He Had Been with Me ” by Laura Nowlin is is a deep dive into the human heart and the paths we choose in life. The characters, intricately woven into the fabric of this narrative, bring to life the joys, pains, and complexities of young love and friendship. As educators and parents, this novel can be a valuable resource in helping young adults navigate their emotional journeys and understand the impact of their choices. It’s a poignant reminder of the power of literature in shaping young minds and hearts.

The God Delusion Summary

Meet Med Kharbach, PhD

Dr. Med Kharbach is an influential voice in the global educational landscape, with an extensive background in educational studies and a decade-long experience as a K-12 teacher. Holding a Ph.D. from Mount Saint Vincent University in Halifax, Canada, he brings a unique perspective to the educational world by integrating his profound academic knowledge with his hands-on teaching experience. Dr. Kharbach's academic pursuits encompass curriculum studies, discourse analysis, language learning/teaching, language and identity, emerging literacies, educational technology, and research methodologies. His work has been presented at numerous national and international conferences and published in various esteemed academic journals.

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If He Had Been With Me, by Laura Nowlin

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If He Had Been with Me

Genre: Social Themes - Dating & Sex, Romance - Contemporary, Coming of Age, Mysteries & Detective Stories, Social Themes - Friendship, Thrillers & Suspense
Published: November 01, 2019
Previous Rank: 39
Buy at Bookshop.org
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A New York Times Bestseller *A BookTok Viral Sensation* An achingly authentic and raw portrait of love, regret, and the life-altering impact of the relationships we hold closest to us, this YA romance bestseller is perfect for fans of Colleen Hoover, Jenny Han, and You've Reached Sam. If he had been with me, everything would have been different... Autumn and Finn used to be inseparable. But then something changed. Or they changed. Now, they do their best to ignore each other. Autumn has her boyfriend Jamie, and her close-knit group of friends. And Finn has become that boy at school, the one everyone wants to be around. That still doesn't stop the way Autumn feels every time she and Finn cross paths, and the growing, nagging thought that maybe things could have been different. Maybe they should be together. But come August, things will change forever. And as time passes, Autumn will be forced to confront how else life might have been different if they had never parted ways... Captivating and heartbreaking, If He Had Been with Me is perfect for readers looking for: Contemporary teen romance books Unputdownable & bingeworthy novels Complex emotional YA stories TikTok Books Jenny Han meets Dear Even Hanson Colleen Hover fans

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If he had been with me

I read this book because of the reviews and all the people gushing over it on TikTok. And I just need someone to discuss it with.

This isn’t a book I’ll ever read again or recommend to anyone else. The first 350 pages nothing really happens and to me what was happening felt very childish. Then we get what we’ve been waiting for in the last few pages and it’s very rushed, and imo confusing.

I’m not really understanding the falling out between Finny and Autumn. She says they both know each other so well they can tell what the other is thinking without having to say anything. So then how did they get so confused with the others feelings and become so uncomfortable around each other without being able to have a conversation?

I’m also not understanding the tragedy that happened at the end. To me it seemed very unnecessary, unlikely, and confusing. One second Finny is fine and Sylvie flew out the window, then Finny isn’t fine but Sylvie is. Also Finny is supposed to be the golden boy, caring, smart and kind. So I don’t see how he didn’t make Sylvie put her seat belt on. And I can’t see how he would have been driving recklessly if he was or how he would have been driving at all if the conditions were to bad to be driving.

Am I the only one who found it confusing and over all not a great read?

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Watch CBS News

Hackers may have stolen your Social Security number in a massive breach. Here's what to know.

By Aimee Picchi

Edited By Anne Marie Lee

Updated on: August 19, 2024 / 9:51 AM EDT / CBS News

A new lawsuit is claiming hackers have gained access to the personal information of "billions of individuals," including their Social Security numbers, current and past addresses and the names of siblings and parents — personal data that could allow fraudsters to infiltrate financial accounts or take out loans in their names.

The allegation arose in a lawsuit filed earlier this month by Christopher Hofmann, a California resident who claims his identity theft protection service alerted him that his personal information had been leaked to the dark web by the "nationalpublicdata.com" breach. The lawsuit was earlier reported by Bloomberg Law.

The breach allegedly occurred around April 2024, with a hacker group called USDoD exfiltrating the unencrypted personal information of billions of individuals from a company called National Public Data (NPD), a background check company, according to the lawsuit. Earlier this month, a hacker leaked a version of the stolen NPD data for free on a hacking forum, tech site Bleeping Computer reported .

That hacker claimed the stolen files include 2.7 billion records, with each listing a person's full name, address, date of birth, Social Security number and phone number, Bleeping Computer said. While it's unclear how many people that includes, it's likely "that everyone with a Social Security number was impacted," said Cliff Steinhauer, director of information security and engagement at The National Cybersecurity Alliance, a nonprofit that promotes online safety.

"It's a reminder of the importance of protecting yourself, because clearly companies and the government aren't doing it for us," Steinhauer told CBS MoneyWatch.

In a statement posted to its website, NPD said the breach involved a "third-party bad actor that was trying to hack into data in late December 2023, with potential leaks of certain data in April 2024 and summer 2024."

The company added that it is working with law enforcement and government investigators. NPD said it "will try to notify you if there are further significant developments applicable to you."

Here's what to know about the alleged hack.

What is National Public Data?

National Public Data is a data company based in Coral Springs, Florida, that provides background checks for employers, investigators and other businesses that want to check people's backgrounds. Its searches include criminal records, vital records, SSN traces and more information, its website says.

There are many similar companies that scrape public data to create files on consumers, which they then sell to other businesses, Steinhauer said.

"They are data brokers that collect and sell data about people, sometimes for background check purposes," he said. "It's because there's no national privacy law in the U.S. — there is no law against them collecting this data against our consent."

What happened with the USDoD hack?

According to the new lawsuit, USDoD on April 8 posted a database called "National Public Data" on the dark web, claiming to have records for about 2.9 billion individuals. It was asking for a purchase price of $3.5 million, the lawsuit claims.

However, Bleeping Computer reported that the file was later leaked for free on a hacker forum, as noted above.

How many people have been impacted?

The number of people impacted by the breach is unclear. Although the lawsuit claims "billions of individuals" had their data stolen, the total population of the U.S. stands at about 330 million. The lawsuit also alleges that the data includes personal information of deceased individuals.

Bleeping Computer reports that the hacked data involves 2.7 billion records, with individuals having multiple records in the database. In other words, one individual could have separate records for each address where they've lived, which means the number of impacted people may be far lower than the lawsuit claims, the site noted.

The data may reach back at least three decades, according to law firm Schubert Jonckheer & Kolbe, which said on Monday it is investigating the breach.

Did NPD alert individuals about the hack?

It's unclear, although the lawsuit claims that NPD "has still not provided any notice or warning" to Hoffman or other people affected by the breach.

"In fact, upon information and belief, the vast majority of Class Members were unaware that their sensitive [personal information] had been compromised, and that they were, and continue to be, at significant risk of identity theft and various other forms of personal, social, and financial harm," the lawsuit claims.

Information security company McAfee reported that it hasn't found any filings with state attorneys general. Some states require companies that have experienced data breaches to file reports with their AG offices.

However, NPD posted an alert about the breach on its website, stating that it believes the information breached includes names, email addresses, phone numbers, Social Security numbers and mailing addresses.

Can you find out if your data was part of the hack?

There are tools available that will monitor what information about you is available on the dark web, noted Michael Blair, managing director of cybersecurity firm NukuDo. Commonly breached data includes your personal addresses, passwords and email, he added.

One such service is how Hofmann, who filed the lawsuit, found out that his information has been leaked as part of NPD breach.

"Make sure to use reputable companies to look that up," Blair said.

What should I do to protect my information?

Security experts recommend that consumers put freezes on their credit files at the three big credit bureaus, Experian, Equifax and TransUnion. Freezing your credit is free, and will stop bad actors from taking out loans or opening credit cards in your name.

"The biggest thing is to freeze your credit report, so it can't be used to open new accounts in your name and commit other fraud in your name," Steinhauer said.

In its statement, NPD also urged people to put free fraud alerts on their accounts, which "tells creditors to contact you before they open any new accounts or change your existing accounts," it said. You'll have to contact just one of the three credit bureaus to create a fraud alert, and that agency will alert the others.

Steinhauer recommends consumers take several additional steps to protect their data and finances:

Make sure your passwords are at least 16 characters in length, and are complex.
Use a password manager to save those long, complex passwords.
Enable multifactor authentication, which Steinhauer calls "critical," because simply using a single password to access your accounts isn't enough protection against hackers.
Be on alert for phishing and other scams. One red flag is that the scammers will try to create a sense of urgency to manipulate their victims.
Keep your security software updated on your computer and other devices. For instance, make sure you download the latest security updates from Microsoft or Apple onto your apps and devices.

You can also get a tracking service that will alert you if your data appears on the dark web.

"You should assume you have been compromised and act accordingly," Steinhauer said.

Data Breach
Social Security

Aimee Picchi is the associate managing editor for CBS MoneyWatch, where she covers business and personal finance. She previously worked at Bloomberg News and has written for national news outlets including USA Today and Consumer Reports.

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On Biden’s Exit, Pelosi Says She Was Driven by Need to Defeat Trump

A new book by the former speaker details her clashes with the former president, but it was written before her most recent exercise of political might: helping persuade President Biden to end his re-election bid.

Share full article

Nancy Pelosi walks down the halls of Congress as she shake hands with her staff. She is wearing a white blazer.

By Carl Hulse

Carl Hulse has covered Nancy Pelosi throughout her career on Capitol Hill.

To hear Representative Nancy Pelosi tell it, her quiet but firm push to get President Biden to withdraw from the 2024 race was a simple matter of the ruthless political math that she has spent decades honing a talent for on Capitol Hill.

“My goal is defeat Donald Trump,” Ms. Pelosi, the former speaker, said in a recent interview before the release this week of a book on her years in Congress. “And when you make a decision to defeat somebody, you make every decision in favor of that. You don’t mess around with it, OK? What is in furtherance of reaching that goal? I thought we had to have a better campaign.”

To the former speaker, the imperative to end Mr. Trump’s political career far outweighed the need for any deference to Mr. Biden, particularly since Democrats were at grave risk of losing the House and Senate if the president remained on the ticket. She seemed willing to accept the consequences of anger from Mr. Biden and his inner circle considering what was at stake.

The book, titled “The Art of Power,” is Ms. Pelosi’s retelling of major moments of critical decision-making during the Iraq War, a catastrophic financial meltdown, the passage of the Affordable Care Act and multiple clashes with former President Donald J. Trump, among other events.

But it may be her most recent deft exercise of political finesse and muscle — one that took place well after the book was written — that will stand as a final testament to Ms. Pelosi’s stature as the Democratic Party’s premier powerhouse of recent decades. In a formidable display of her enduring clout, she helped persuade the incumbent president to abandon his re-election bid to give her party a better chance of holding the White House in November.

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How did Raygun qualify for the Olympics? Is she really the best Australia has to offer?

By Mawunyo Gbogbo

ABC Entertainment

Topic: Olympic Games

Rachael "Raygun" Gunn did not score a single point at the Paris Olympics. ( Getty Images: Elsa )

Since Australian breaker Rachael "Raygun" Gunn failed to score a single point in any of her Olympic bouts, many have asked how she qualified for the Games.

Fellow breaker and anthropologist Lucas Marie says she won her qualification "fair and square" last year, but African American man Malik Dixon has criticised the Olympic body for letting her in.

What's next?

Breaking will not be an event at the 2028 Los Angeles Olympic Games — a decision made before Raygun's performance.

The 2024 Paris Olympics marked breaking's debut as a sport at the global event, with 36-year-old lecturer and breaker Rachael "Raygun" Gunn representing Australia for the first time.

Having failed to win a single point in any of her Olympic bouts, Raygun quickly became a viral sensation.

The question on many people's minds now is: How did she even qualify?

Lucas Marie is a breaker who has competed, performed, taught and judged breaking competitions over the past 25 years. He's also an anthropologist who recently co-authored an article with Gunn.

He says the answer to that question is simple.

A black and white close-up image of Lucas Marie smiling.

Lucas Marie recently co-authored an article with Raygun. ( Supplied )

"There was an Oceania qualifier in which any B-boy or B-girl from Australia [or] New Zealand could enter, and that was in Sydney in October 2023," he told ABC News.

"And leading up to that, there were a lot of other events in which breakers were competing.

"She won those battles fair and square and won the qualification in Sydney.

"And it wasn't really a surprise to anyone.

"She's been fairly consistent, winning or coming second or third at a lot of breaking events in Australia for the last five to 10 years."

Marie said there was nothing out of the ordinary about Raygun's performance.

"It's not like gymnastics where there's this kind of agreed-upon standard," he said.

"It's always had a rawness to it. It's always had an improvisational kind of quality. And I think looking different and trying different stuff has always been celebrated.

"And I think Raygun, in a way, was just expressing a core kind of hip hop trait in a way a lot of breakers do."

He described her efforts as bold.

"I thought — and this is how I judge a lot of breaking events — I thought, 'Oh, she's making some really interesting choices to mimic Australian animals.' And you can kind of see the choices that she's making in the moment."

Is she the best Australia has to offer?

Team Australia chef de mission Anna Meares insisted after Raygun's performance that she was the best breaker the country had to offer. But is this true?

A man in purple pants doing a handstand.

Lucas Marie has competed, performed, taught and judged breaking competitions for more than 25 years. ( Supplied: momentsby.naz )

"It's sometimes just who's performing better on the day," Marie said.

"And at the qualification event in which she won, and other events in which she's won, she performed better on that day and won the ticket.

"That doesn't mean she's the best. It doesn't really work like that.

"I think she's a great breaker. She won the qualification. She's won other events in the past, and she was a good representative for Australia at that competition."

Asked whether there were B-girls in Perth, regional Victoria or rural Brisbane who might have qualified but could not afford to travel to Sydney for the tryouts, Marie agreed this was possible.

"Of course, there's breakers all over the country that maybe should have been in that event, but they weren't."

Breaking will not carry over to the 2028 Olympics in Los Angeles, a decision made before Raygun's battle.

Marie described this as sad.

"Maybe, based on the ratings, they'll reassess that and maybe allocate some medals to breaking," he said.

"I really hope that's the case, and I hope that for other breakers who want to compete in it as a dance sport."

Marie said that at the end of the day people should remember they were dealing with a human.

"As a friend of Rachael's, there's a human being who's getting a lot of negative attention," he said.

"I think people kind of miss that sometimes and forget the human aspect of all this."

'Toying with the culture'

Malik Dixon is an African American who has been living in Australia for more than a decade and is a Sydney University graduate.

He said Raygun made a total "mockery" out of breaking at the Olympics.

A blurry image of Malik Dixon wearing a blue shirt reading "CHAPEL HILL".

Malik Dixon says too many people feel entitled to African American culture. ( Supplied )

"She was dressed like a member of the cricket team or an Australian PE teacher, and from that point it just seemed like satire," Mr Dixon told ABC News.

"It just looked like somebody who was toying with the culture and didn't know how culturally significant it was being the first time in the Olympics and just how important it was to people who really cherish hip hop and one of the elements of hip hop, which is breakdancing.

"It made me think, was Borat her breakdancing coach?"

Mr Dixon said too many people felt entitled to African American culture.

"The African American space has been one where we've shared our community so much and without any restraints, any barriers, roadblocks, obstacles, any gatekeepers, that essentially what should have been African American cultural capital is just shared, which is cool," he said.

"We like to share, right?

"We shared 400 years of free labour.

"To see Rachael in her attempt to be a part of the culture just be grossly underwhelming made it seem like she didn't take it seriously."

Olympics body criticised for Raygun qualification

Mr Dixon criticised the body that qualified Raygun, saying she devalued breaking with her performance.

"Whatever governing body nominated her as Australia's entrant into the Olympics either did not understand the assignment or didn't really believe in the integrity or significance of breakdancing, because if they did they would just say, rather than disrespect the culture, we're just not ready to send an applicant this year."

He said Raygun was extremely audacious and not self-aware.

"You've got to know your role, know your position, know your limitation," he said.

"And I think that part of privilege is saying that there are no limits to what I can do.

"Part of privilege is having the authority to say that there are no limits and there are no requirements, there are no prerequisites to what I can do."

Raygun's degrees do not hold much water with Mr Dixon.

"Due to consumerism, this Foundational Black American product, which is hip hop, is global," he said.

"And even people who have no connection to any African Americans or any local or regional things that come out in these songs, they have become a part of the whole experience now.

"If I came in and said that I was an authority on Greek music and I was going against the grain of what the mainstream Greek musicians thought, or the school of thought, and I've said that I was the authority, people would check me on that.

"If I had a PhD in sprinting, does that qualify me to go against Noah Lyles? No, it doesn't."

He also doubts Raygun was the best breaker Australia had to offer.

"[There's] got to be somebody out here that's better than that! The kangaroo! The sprinkler! She did the sprinkler out there, man!" he said.

Should everybody just lighten up?

Should we lighten up? Mr Dixon does not believe so.

"Larrikinism is used as a get-out-of-jail-free card and to escape responsibility of how words or actions impact a hurt person," he said.

"But when the majority culture is offended, there's no playing around.

"This is a part of my culture, and I don't think Australians are in a place to tell me how I should feel about breakdancing being mocked on an international stage.

"People who don't have any or limited access to black people or hip hop culture now may see Rachael and her buffoonery as a representation of hip hop and black culture.

"People who were already side-eyeing breakdancing as an Olympic sport, Rachael Gunn has put the nail in that coffin.

"This might be the most viral clip of the whole Olympics. From a comedy standpoint, she's got it, but from an Olympics perspective, its regressive."

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Elon Musk Hardcover – September 12, 2023

Print length 688 pages
Language English
Publisher Simon & Schuster
Publication date September 12, 2023
Dimensions 6.13 x 1.9 x 9.25 inches
ISBN-10 1982181281
ISBN-13 978-1982181284
See all details

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Publisher ‏ : ‎ Simon & Schuster (September 12, 2023)
Language ‏ : ‎ English
Hardcover ‏ : ‎ 688 pages
ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 1982181281
ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-1982181284
Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 2.25 pounds
Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 6.13 x 1.9 x 9.25 inches
#1 in Computer & Technology Biographies
#2 in Scientist Biographies
#3 in Biographies of Business & Industrial Professionals

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About the author, walter isaacson.

Walter Isaacson is writing a biography of Elon Musk. He is the author of The Code Breaker: Jennifer Doudna, Gene Editing, and the Future of the Human Race; Leonardo da Vinci; Steve Jobs; Einstein: His Life and Universe; Benjamin Franklin: An American Life; The Innovators: How a Group of Hackers, Geniuses, and Geeks Created the Digital Revolution; and Kissinger: A Biography. He is also the coauthor of The Wise Men: Six Friends and the World They Made. He is a Professor of History at Tulane, has been CEO of the Aspen Institute, chairman of CNN, and editor of Time magazine.

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Customers find the book refreshingly objective, compelling, and fascinating. They also describe the characters as flawed and ruthless. Readers praise the writing quality as well-written, creative, and simple. They describe the book as captivating, worth the purchase, and presenting the facts without sugarcoating. Opinions are mixed on the content, with some finding it candid and fair, while others say it's hypocritical and disjointed. Reader opinions are mixed also on the storyline, with others finding it meticulously crafted and long, while still others say the ending is disappointing.

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Customers find the book captivating, displaying an exquisite balance of awe-inspiring moments coupled with grounded critique. They also appreciate the short chapters, each on a different theme. Readers say the book provides insight into both Musk’s incredible genius and ruthless. They say it’s refreshingly objective, presenting the facts without sugarcoating, allowing them to form their own opinions.

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Customers have mixed opinions about the storyline. Some find the narrative outstanding and a page turner, while others say it's disjointed, time jumping at times, and confusing. They also say the book is long and the ending is disappointing.

"... Compelling Narrative Style :Walter Isaacson's storytelling skills are evident throughout the book...." Read more

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"...Finally, my only criticism of this book is that the author has NOT finished the story . Spoiler Alert: The story ends abruptly in April of 2023...." Read more

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Customers are mixed about the content. Some find the author extraordinarily candid and fair in his commentaries about the main characters. They also appreciate Elon Musk's audacity, visions, drive, and result. However, some customers say the book is grossly inept, boring, and disjointed. They say it's not purposefully dishonest and not good journalism.

"...he asked a few days after Gates’s visit. “It’s pure hypocrisy . Why make money on the failure of a sustainable energy car company?”"..." Read more

"...Isaacson's work is a testament to the power of biography to inspire, educate , and entertain." Read more

"...in a good light in some ways while it also shows his crazy, dysfunctional bad side . It seems it's a fair appraisal...." Read more

"...also it was hilarious ...." Read more

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Book Review: If He Had Been With Me By Laura Nowlin
If He Had Been with Me
If He Had Been with Me Book Review
If He Had Been With Me Book Review
If He Had Been With Me by Laura Nowlin
If He Had Been With Me

COMMENTS

If He Had Been with Me Book Review
Our review: Parents say ( 8 ): Kids say ( 17 ): This is a slow-burn romance that focuses on the main character's story and thoughts. In If He Had Been with Me, we see family, friendship, high school, and romance through Autumn's point of view. The storytelling is simple and repetitive.
If He Had Been with Me
It was raining, of course. And he and Sylvie were arguing as he drove down the slick road. No one ever says what they were arguing about. Other people think it's not important. They do not know there is another story. The story that lurks between the facts. What they do not know—the cause of the argument—is crucial.
IF HE HAD BEEN WITH ME
by Laura Nowlin ‧ RELEASE DATE: Feb. 6, 2024. A heavy read about the harsh realities of tragedy and their effects on those left behind. In this companion novel to 2013's If He Had Been With Me, three characters tell their sides of the story. Finn's narrative starts three days before his death.
Book Review: If He Had Been with Me by Laura Nowlin
January 12, 2023 by Heidi Dischler. With friendships lost and found, and a doomed romance, I knew I had to review If He Had Been with Me for you guys. Not only because it's super popular and has been recommended on every social media platform I'm on, but because it's genuinely a good book. There's a reason it ended up on my Top Ten Best ...
Book Review: If He Had Been with Me
Reading If He Had Been with Me was an emotional adventure that touched my heart and left a strong impression on me. Laura Nowlin created an authentic and honest story about the ups and downs of friendship, love, and loss. As I read the book, I felt a strong connection to Autumn and Finny as they went through life's challenges together.
If He Had Been with Me by Laura Nowlin
3. Summary. "If He Had Been with Me" by Laura Nowlin is a poignant and introspective young adult novel that explores the intricacies of friendship, love, and self-discovery during the tumultuous time of adolescence. At the heart of the story are two best friends, Autumn and Finny, who have been inseparable since childhood.
Parent reviews for If He Had Been with Me
This book was great. However, it has many mature themes so I think it would be most suitable for teens 15+. Writing is not great, but the content is appealing. Sexual language, definitely not appropriate for children. Read If He Had Been with Me reviews from parents on Common Sense Media.
Review : If he had been with me, Laura Nowlin
Laura Nowlin, If he had been with me, published by Sourcebooks Fire, April 1st, 2013. If he had been with me everything would have been different…. I wasn't with Finn on that August night. But I should've been. It was raining, of course. And he and Sylvie were arguing as he drove down the slick road. No one ever says what they were ...
If He Had Been With Me
Anecdote. "If He Had Been With Me" delves into the intricate lives of Autumn and Finn, childhood friends whose journey through love, loss, and self-discovery is at the heart of the narrative. Autumn, portrayed as a thoughtful and introspective young woman, sets the stage by reflecting deeply on her life and the defining moments that have ...
If He Had Been with Me
If He Had Been with Me. Paperback - November 1, 2019. by Laura Nowlin (Author) 4.2 44,167 ratings. #1 Best Seller in Teen & Young Adult Friendship Fiction. See all formats and editions. Save $5 when you buy $25 of select items Shop items. More than ONE MILLION copies sold! A BookTok Viral Sensation.
If He Had Been with Me Series by Laura Nowlin
Book 1-2. Friends to Lovers Series Volume 1 and 2 If He Had Been with Me + If Only I had Told Her. by Laura Nowlin. 3.84 · 29,823 Ratings · 3,314 Reviews · 5 editions. Friends to Lovers series | Volume 1 and 2 as soft …. Want to Read. Rate it:
If He Had Been With Me Book Review
If He Had Been With Me Book Review. March 17, 2024 by Crystal @ Sharing Life's Moments. I love a solid romance story. In several book groups, I saw plenty of people recommend If He Had Been With Me by Laura Nowlin. It has well over 30,000 reviews on Amazon and over 250,000 on Goodreads, so I included this book on my 24 books in 2024.
Amazon.com: Customer reviews: If He Had Been with Me
Book #5 May 2024 & #36 for 2024! "If He Had Been With Me" by Laura Nowlin. Tropes/Themes: Childhood Bestfriends to Lovers, Across 4 Years of High School, Grief/Mental Health/Self-Harm/Unplanned Pregnancies. Rating: 4⭐️'s for plot/storyline & 1🌶️ for spice. •
If He Had Been with Me
If He Had Been with Me. 328p. Sourcebooks/Fire. 2013. pap. $9.99. ISBN 978-1-4022-7782-5. Gr 9 Up— Autumn Davis and Phineas Smith grew up together; their mothers are best friends and next-door neighbors. Hand in hand, they experienced life's milestones until adolescence; that's when they grow apart as each one struggles to form an identity ...
If He Had Been with Me Summary, Characters, and Book Club Questions
The primary characters in "If He Had Been with Me" include: Autumn - She is the protagonist of the novel, navigating the complexities of her feelings and relationships. Autumn is introspective and deals with the emotional turmoil of her unexpressed feelings for Finn, her childhood friend, while being in a relationship with Jamie. Finn ...
If He Had Been with Me by Laura Nowlin Book Reviews
978-1402277825. Buy This Book. If he had been with me, everything would have been different. I wasn't with Finn on that August night. But I should've been. It was raining, of course. And he and Sylvie were arguing as he drove down the slick road. No one ever says what they were arguing about.
If He Had Been with Me by Laura Nowlin
RRP £8.99. Your local Waterstones may have stock of this item. Please check by using Click & Collect. A heart-rendingly romantic story of lost love and second chances that has taken TikTok by storm, If He Had Been With Me charts the ebb and flow of Autumn and Finn's feelings for each other.
Book Review: if he had been with me *SPOILERS*
If he had been with me by Laura Nowlin book review with spoilers. This book is a young adult novel that centers around a girl in high school navigating love ...
If He Had Been with Me (Collector's Edition)
Book #5 May 2024 & #36 for 2024!"If He Had Been With Me" by Laura Nowlin.Tropes/Themes: Childhood Bestfriends to Lovers, Across 4 Years of High School, Grief/Mental Health/Self-Harm/Unplanned Pregnancies.Rating: 4⭐️'s for plot/storyline & 1🌶️ for spice.•I have heard of this book all over #booktok and #bookstagram, so I knew it was going to be sad going into it, I just had such ...
If He Had Been With Me, by Laura Nowlin
A book review blog with crazy discussions and fangirlized opinions. ... Genre: Young Adult Fiction, Contemporary, Tragedy Rating: 5/5 stars Goodreads Summary: If he had been with me everything would have been different ... and there's no signs of stopping. Hand me a YA book (specifically from the dystopia, sci-fi, contemporary, romance, or ...
If he had been with me : r/books
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If He Had Been with Me
If He Had Been with Me. A New York Times Bestseller *A BookTok Viral Sensation* An achingly authentic and raw portrait of love, regret, and the life-altering impact of the relationships we hold ...
If he had been with me : r/books
To me it seemed very unnecessary, unlikely, and confusing. One second Finny is fine and Sylvie flew out the window, then Finny isn't fine but Sylvie is. Also Finny is supposed to be the golden boy, caring, smart and kind. So I don't see how he didn't make Sylvie put her seat belt on. And I can't see how he would have been driving ...
The Pain of Matthew Perry's Last Days as He Relied on Ketamine
On the day Matthew Perry died, his live-in personal assistant gave him his first ketamine shot of the morning at around 8:30 a.m.About four hours later, while Mr. Perry watched a movie at his home ...
Hackers may have stolen your Social Security number in a massive breach
That hacker claimed the stolen files include 2.7 billion records, with each listing a person's full name, address, date of birth, Social Security number and phone number, Bleeping Computer said.
The Anxious Generation: How the Great Rewiring of Childhood Is Causing
THE INSTANT #1 NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER • A must-read for all parents: the generation-defining investigation into the collapse of youth mental health in the era of smartphones, social media, and big tech—and a plan for a healthier, freer childhood. "Erudite, engaging, combative, crusading." — New York Times Book Review (Editors' Choice) "Words that chill the parental heart ...
Yes, Trump Was in a Scary Helicopter Ride. But Not With That Politician
Mr. Holden said that he called Mr. Brown to compare notes. Mr. Brown told him he had never been in a helicopter with Mr. Trump. "I said, 'Willie, you know what? That's me!'" Mr. Holden said.
On Biden's Exit, Pelosi Says She Was Driven by Need to Defeat Trump
A new book by the former speaker details her clashes with the former president, but it was written before her most recent exercise of political might: helping persuade President Biden to end his ...
How did Raygun qualify for the Olympics? Is she really the best
The 2024 Paris Olympics marked breaking's debut as a sport at the global event, with 36-year-old lecturer and breaker Rachael "Raygun" Gunn representing Australia for the first time.
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Heidi Dischler

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Review | Heidi Dischler

“Sometimes I am disappointed with love. I thought that when you were in love, it would always be right there, staring you in the face, reminding you every moment that you love this person. It seems that it isn’t always like that.”

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